Fantasy vs. reality
You are the type of woman whose imagination inhabits a colorful, racy fantasy world where, stripped of your inhibitions, you’re free to luxuriate in your fantasy life as a seductress. In your wild daydreams you personify that woman who, with a simple flip of her hair and a come hither gaze, can entrance any man into a state of euphoria.
But in the real world, that sense of adventure and sexual freedom you so freely wield in your fantasies is nonexistent. That lacy teddy your boyfriend bought you for Valentine ’s Day has been sitting in your drawer untouched and still bears its tags. Although you are ready to show your boyfriend this naughtier, more playful aspect of your personality how can you get over your shyness and embarrassment?
Embrace your newbieness – it’s sexy!
A pleasure expert who has studied with the world’s experts and worked with thousands of men and women, teaching them to express themselves with sex and seduction. “Newbie seductresses possess the innocence of a newborn learning to walk and how adorable is that? You can’t help but giggle at the stumbles, the fumbles, the grasping and oh, yeah, the falls!”
According to Dame Lori, the more you approve of and enjoy that shy, virginal, vulnerable, blushing and terrified part of you… the hotter, sexier, cuter and more precious you will be to your man.
“I am not a fan of ‘getting over’ anything in life, I have found it to be more pleasurable when I am in agreement with my shyness and embarrassment,” says Dame Lori. “Celebrate your adorable shyness and the awkwardness of blushing. It will lead the way to having more fun.”
Dame Lori also notes that although seduction is always seen as doing something sexual or naughty, for the most part during the day, it is neither. In fact Dame Lori says she uses it as a serious communication tool all day long to engage with others.
Seduction is not just about sex
“Seducing my way all day affirms my joy, my lust and my desire to share all of this with the world,” says Dame Lori. “ I practice the art of seduction when I’m loving up my two-year old toy poodle, Lily, and puppy training her by whispering ‘good girl’ into her ear. I practice the art of seduction when I encourge my eight year old daughter to take a shower by offering a new rose soap. I practice seduction when heating up my marital bed with silly new ideas. I believe seduction is my lifeline to the greater divine universe where fun, pleasure and joy rules – no matter what. And as Bob Dylan says, ‘You got to serve somebody.’ I say why not serve your seduction…whether in shyness or sassiness or both?”
Dame Lori offers these seven ways to seduce your man – in spite of your shyness
#1 Tell him you are shy.
Tell your man that you are terrifyingly shy and you don’t know what to do next. Ask him if he is okay with your shyness. (But don’t worry of course, he is— shyness is an automatic hot seduction tool, trust me!)
#2 Practice being “The Shy Seductress!”
Create a performance based upon the sublime sweetness of shy…fan dancing…scarf twirling…anything that is fun for you. You don’t have to do this in front of your guy…only in front of your mirror!
#3 Use shy props.
Throughout history women have used fans and veils, you can use a shirt, napkin or anything at hand as an absolutely amazing tool to cover your face, your mouth and express your emotions when you are not able to speak!
#4 Write notes to each other…
Or letters… or text him for a while until you are ready for a voice-to-voice conversation. These are amazing ways to lead you into taking the next steps that YOU are ready for. Not his steps…yours!
#5 Go out with another seductress who is more skilled than you.
Research and observe firsthand what a great seductress is and how she enjoys taking her pleasure with men. Women require a community of support to play pleasure and practice the expansion and celebration of their sensuality. It’s fun… it pushes and forces you to stretch and use new skills you would otherwise not do solo!
#6 Practice with other men.
This is essential to build our confidence and get us comfortable with standard seduction skills. Use your skilled seductress friends to create pleasurable seductions with your men friends…. a la Cyrano-style.
#7 Ask your guy for some pointers.
When it comes to being a shy seductress, ask him if he could help you create some great shy seductions given your circumstances. Get your guy thinking imaginatively, cooking up some fun scenarios that could be hilariously fun for you two… ask him for 5 or 10 ideas.
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